Coping With Change

It seems impossible to avoid change in our lives, no matter how much we would prefer things to remain the same. Even when these changes offer us the opportunity to transform our lives, they invariably arrive at the worst possible time bringing lots of disruption, frustration or pain. Some of the brighter opportunities often bring all three together. It just doesn’t seem fair.

Modern life moves at a dramatically faster pace than at any previous time in history, so usually the easiest thing to do when presented with unwelcome events is to try and remain in our comfort zone by avoiding change at all costs. This means that instead of letting go of the past and moving on to pastures new, we cling on tightly to yesterday, which then limits the possibilities for tomorrow. Fear of the unknown often stifles our progress in life.

Remember that being flexible and adapting to unplanned changes in our circumstances helps us grow and develop, even when we have not even made the conscious decision to improve ourselves. Despite the disruption, in the end this is how we learn and become a wiser person. It’s also how we become more successful too.

An old proverb advises us that, ‘Every change brings an opportunity’, and it is true that change can be the route to your dreams and goals rather than a barrier to them. Your perceptions will determine whether or not you will turn life’s challenges to your advantage. But one thing is for sure; change is inevitable, so we should learn how to deal with it effectively.

Growth and development

Towards the end of his poem ‘The Rainy Day’, Henry Wadsworth Longfellow summed up life rather well when he concluded, ‘Into each life a little rain must fall, Some days must be dark and dreary’. He had obviously been having a bit of a bad day when he wrote that, but nonetheless this evocative poem reflects the way that we all feel from time to time as we struggle through our daily lives.

And since all of us, without exception, lives in an ever changing world which brings continual challenges, we should try to adapt to new ideas and concepts in everyday situations. The wise person understands, accepts and adjusts to the arrival of something new, seeing the challenge for what it is – growth and development of their whole being, including their soul. Of course, this is not always easy.

Many people do not like change, and withdraw to hide in a world where they feel safe and secure whilst the world around them continues to change unrelentingly. This is only natural, and we’ve probably all done this at some time or other. But we should remember that although this new path in life may make us anxious and uncomfortable, it also opens up the door to new experiences and possibilities that were not available in our old circumstances.

Dependability

When everything around us is changing and we feel unable to cope, it is unbelievably reassuring to find something stable that we know will remain constant, no matter what happens. Aromatherapy is one such resource that can be depended upon to help us through periods of instability and change in our lives. It can bring welcome continuity and reassurance, plus some well needed protection from the stormy world of change raging about us! Aromatherapy can be our anchor.

Whilst travelling the bumpy road of life, our trusty essential oils will be there at all times to help soothe the resentment, anger and despair that so often accompanies unwelcome change. To take the first positive steps towards regaining control of the chaos, we need only choose the appropriate essential oils to ease the negative emotion we are experiencing. Once balance is restored we can move on, now more experienced and wiser to ultimately attain greater achievements.

As individuals, we will all react differently to given circumstances. Broadly speaking though, when confronted with unwelcome change we will typically experience one or more of the emotions below. Here are some essential oils that can help you cope with them. You can use them in your burner, in the bath or in a massage if you prefer.

• Fear – This is a natural reaction that humans experience whenever they are threatened in any sense, whether physically or emotionally. Although it may not be the obvious emotion that we might experience during times of change, but after the initial shock of change fear often lurks at the back of the mind impeding our progress. At such times, essential oils of cedar atlas, cypress, frankincense, juniper berry, palmarosa, rose and ylang ylang can help allay those irrational fears and aid the transition into a new phase of life.

• Anger and resentment - After the initial shock of your new state of affairs, anger or resentment often follows fear. Roman chamomile, frankincense, geranium, grapefruit, helichrysum, neroli, orange sweet and ylang ylang are soothing and calming essential oils that can be applied effectively to relieve the outrage that is often felt when unwelcome circumstances intrude into our lives.

• Frustration - When we really want to change our situation but know that we can’t right now due to circumstances beyond our control, it often leads to frustration. During such times, bergamot, grapefruit, lavender, orange sweet and yuzu essential oils all help to soothe the irritation frustration that wells up. Roman chamomile, frankincense and ylang ylang are also valuable when trying to calm the frustration and impatience we must endure in modern life.

• Insecurity – After times of great upheaval we may sometimes be left feeling vulnerable and insecure. During this phase, essential oils of bergamot, geranium, jasmine, juniper berry, patchouli, sandalwood, yarrow and vetiver bring stability and strength to those who feel damaged by life’s circumstances and adversities, acting as a ‘grounding’ agent to the weary soul.

• Regret – After the first raw emotions have been tackled and overcome, a tinge of regret often remains to haunt us with thoughts of, ‘Why didn’t I’ . . . . ‘if only I hadn’t’ . . . . Of all the negative emotions, regret often lingers the longest and if not dealt with effectively it can leave emotional scars that remain for life. If you find yourself suffering pangs of regret or despair try essential oils of grapefruit, helichrysum, lemon, rose, sandalwood, spikenard, yarrow and yuzu to help you to dump this draining, emotional baggage

The chances are you will never learn to welcome change, but aromatherapy can help you cope better with it when it inevitably arrives. Human beings are quite capable of adapting to a wide variety of circumstances and situations, it’s just that modern life seems to make it just that little bit harder to deal with.

If you allow aromatherapy to be an anchor in your life you could find that change is no longer the disorienting and frightening experience it used to be, and learn to accept it is simply part of life’s rich plan providing an opportunity for you to grow as a human being.

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